Let’s Replace the Day-to-day Kos Ukraine Reduction Tote Board
It’s been a couple of weeks since we checked in at the fund arrange to assist reduction businesses in Ukraine. Turns out just like the blink of an eye fixed right here, however on a daily basis over there’s a lengthy, chilly, bad, unpredictable slog. Even if some say it’s technically spring (Can anyone verify that for me? I are living in Maine.) the desire for elementary survival necessities remains to be crucial, thus the explanation why Day-to-day Kos arrange this fund. Since mid-March you added greater than $30,000 for the selected organizations that supply meals, hospital treatment, housing, schooling, monetary assist, and animal rescue sources. The brand new general…
$3,704,280.98
…and also you must give yourselves a hand for that. To toughen the selected teams—the International Central Kitchen, AmeriCares, Razom for Ukraine, and the Global Fund for Animal Welfare—click on right here and donate by way of ActBlue. Thank you in your ongoing toughen. And in addition in your ongoing heart arms to Russia.
Cheers and Jeers for Tuesday, April 2, 2024
Word: FREE GYROCOPTER RIDES ALL DAY!!!!
Disclaimer: Should carry personal gyrocopter and supply unfastened rides all day.
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By means of the Numbers:
10 days!!!
Days ’til the 2024 Olympics in Paris: 115
Days ’til the 87th annual Atlanta Dogwood Competition: 10
New minimal salary for fast-food staff in California that kicked in the day before today: $20/hr.
Collection of fast-food staff in California: 500,000
Estimated collection of American bridges which are in deficient situation, in line with ABC Information: 42,400
Age of Gmail as of this month: 20
Age of Gloria Steinem as of closing week: 90
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Pet Pic of the Day: Sitting lesson…
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JEERS to fundraising insanity. I do know applicants must ship out money-beg emails, however I positive want they might work out a approach to do it extra creatively. Show off A: the Biden-Harris marketing campaign—the one one I have never unsubscribed to as a result of I need to stay tabs on their internet affiliate marketing efforts. Listed here are their contemporary subject-line messages, which I may almost definitely recite from reminiscence from more than a few political campaigns from 20 years in the past:
Lacking your signature, William … If you happen to knew this, would not you chip in? … Our apologies … Our sincerest apologies … President Biden for my part reached out … Now not nice … You deserve an evidence … Unique alternative enclosed for William … Is there ANYTHING we will be able to say to persuade you, William? … Please give us an opportunity to provide an explanation for … We’d like you, particularly these days … Here is the deal, William … Yet one more donation earlier than the top of the month … Pummeled (we are nervous) … LAST name: we’re so shut … That is the FINAL name!
And so forth (and so forth). Each and every candidate. Each and every marketing campaign. Each and every advocacy team. Each and every PAC. Identical factor. All stuffing our in-boxes with cookie-cutter messages that careen from irrational exuberance to pulse-pounding desperation. It is sufficient to pressure you loopy. However now not me—I handed that threshold a very long time in the past.
JEERS to these days’s version of That is The Least Unexpected Factor I have Heard All Day. Courtesy of CBS Information:
A lead U.S. army investigator inspecting stories of what has grow to be referred to as Havana Syndrome advised 60 Mins he believes U.S. officers are being attacked by way of Russia …
A 2023 govt file deemed it “not possible” {that a} overseas adversary was once at the back of the mysterious mind accidents suffered by way of U.S. nationwide safety officers, but greater than 100 American citizens have signs scientists say may well be led to by way of a beam of microwaves or acoustic ultrasound. Sufferers are pissed off that the federal government publicly doubts an adversary is concentrated on American citizens. The continuing, five-year 60 Mins investigation has now exposed new proof pointing towards Russia.
This has been these days’s version of That is The Least Unexpected Factor I have Heard All Day.
CHEERS to Charles Corridor. He patented aluminum 135 years in the past these days. And made the sector secure for paranoids in every single place:
An Aluminum Foil Deflector Beanie (AFDB) is a kind of headwear that may protect your mind from maximum electromagnetic psychotronic thoughts keep an eye on carriers.
It’s simply science, folks. It’s. Simply. Science.
AFDBs are reasonably priced (even unfastened if you do not thoughts scrounging for thrown-out aluminium foil) and will also be built by way of somebody with a minimum of the dexterity of a chimp (possibly bonobo). This reasonable and unobtrusive type of thoughts keep an eye on coverage gives actual safety to the hundreds. Now not handiest do they offer protection to in opposition to incoming indicators, however in addition they block maximum varieties of mind scanning and thoughts studying, holding the secrets and techniques on your head in reality secret. AFDBs are secure and function routinely. All you do is make it and put on it and you are just right to head! Plus, AFDBs are trendy and at ease.
Take note, bunker dwellers: glossy aspect out!
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BRIEF SANITY BREAK
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END BRIEF SANITY BREAK
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CHEERS to holding the religion (to your self). The downward spiral of participation in arranged faith continues in The us, as a mixture of church leaders behaving badly, old-fashioned dogma (insert “were given run over by way of my karma” comic story right here), and unwashed rabble with extra necessary issues to do result in empty pews and dwindling coffers. And Gallup’s newest file is, neatly, holy moly, Batman…
Fifty years in the past, in 1973, 87% of U.S. adults known with a Christian faith, 6% have been non-Christian or any other faith, and 5% didn’t have a non secular desire. Thus, a lot of the trade within the U.S. has been a shift clear of Christian religions to no faith in any respect. […]
“Jesus, can I see you in my place of job please?” —Offended God, after seeing this chart
Even if maximum American citizens have a non secular desire and say faith is a minimum of relatively necessary to them, a lot smaller proportions continuously attend spiritual products and services.
Requested whether or not they for my part had attended church, synagogue, mosque or temple previously seven days, a median of 32% of U.S. adults in 2023 reported that they had executed so, both in individual or just about. In 2000, 44% had long gone to church previously seven days, and in 1958, 49% had.
Golly. I am nervous. If the bajillion other gods humankind has get a hold of over the millennia to scare humanity into unquestioning obedience ever make a decision which one among them would be the one to smite us for going rogue like this, we are in large bother.
P.S. You’ve got a speck on your eye! Ha Ha take a look at that speck! I mock you and your eye speck! Sincerely, Log Guy.
CHEERS to important balls, little balls, balls balls balls! After a wild March of ups and downs and smiles and frowns—to not point out a street plagued by busted brackets—your NCAA Fabulous 4 ladies’s matchups are: South Carolina vs. NC State and Iowa vs. UConn.
God assist any of you youngsters who run “afoul” of referee McGillicutty’s eagle eyes.
Now not many of us know this, however I attempted to compete at the basketball court docket at school. Didn’t figure out. Trainer mentioned I didn’t have what it takes. (Like, say, top.) So chances are you’ll say my hoops have been dashed.
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Ten years in the past in C&J: April 2, 2014
CHEERS to dancing within the Isles. Giant doings in over in England and Wales. Louisa Peacock on the Telegraph paperwork the chaos of the previous few days:
Smartly people, we had the warmest weekend of the 12 months up to now and—AND—the primary homosexual weddings in Britain came about.
We did not have any floods … Ukip, I am having a look at you. Ukip councillor David Silvester not too long ago recommended that the Executive’s resolution to legalise homosexual marriage had resulted in the disastrous contemporary storms and heavy floods throughout the United Kingdom. Smartly—surprise! Horror! WE ALL SURVIVED.
We are sending all of the glad couplers the standard British wedding-day reward: a Benny Hill tea comfy.
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And only one extra…
CHEERS to middle of the night sparklies. Now I do know why our moon and all of the planets and stars within the galaxy apply secure social distancing from us: we are loopy!!! However that may’t prevent the universe’s maximum obnoxious parasites—that may be us—from watching up and marveling at all of the conquering now we have but to do. The elves at NASA all the time allow us to in at the large celestial occasions for the month, and right here’s a take a look at April’s sky-watching guidelines, together with main points on subsequent week’s eclipse and a comet losing by way of to mention hi there:
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And don’t disregard to head out of doors, recall to mind Neil Armstrong, and wink on the complete moon at the twenty third. It is the regulation.
Have a tolerable Tuesday. Ground’s open…What are you cheering and jeering about these days?
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Nowadays’s Shameless C&J Testimonial
“The iconography of Cheers and Jeers as a spot of freedom and boldness, the ones concepts have indisputably been a part of Beyonce’s ongoing celebrity symbol.”
—Francesca Royster
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